Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Prayin' for Patience...Again.

I have returned to DC after an AH-mazing time in California. I am really grateful to my friends for encouraging me (so much so that they bought me a plane ticket! Sooo generous! I have such great, great friends) to come visit them in LA. It was a much needed vacation and the trip was totally perfect. Perfect weather, lots to do, beautiful location! My 2 college friends who used to live in my dorm at CUA and then also in my apt. building in Arlington, moved 2 years ago to LA and none of us could understand why. I now understand. Here is the view of their 'backyard':

I'd been to Cali before, but not LA. We did the touristy LA stuff like Hollywood and Beverly Hills. I was also there for the 4th of July, so I helped them prepare for their BBQ (well, 'help' is a loose term when it comes to me in the kitchen, we know) and then we also spent time relaxing on the beach in Malibu. If it were not for grad school and my friends here in DC, I would seriously consider moving there. I do love DC, but it is loosing it's allure for me, and I do love me some beach and sun!

Here are more pics of the aforementioned friends and events:

But now it is back to reality. I was really sad to leave. I was taking a vacation from many things it seemed- work, prayer, and my life here in DC- all of which have been leaving me just a little...for lack of a better word...."meh".

Today is the year anniversary of the day I started at my current job. It's not been the year I anticipated, let's just say. I do believe in the work I do and the organization's mission, but it hasn't been 'fulfilling' as we know. And as a single laywoman- my roommate has brought up this point before- it seems we seek fulfillment in our work, since we do not have a family or other vocation per se.

But I know that we cannot take our identity in our jobs. Nor can we take our identity in being a mother or a wife, etc. First and foremost we are a child of God. All the other things stem from and lead to that. It's not our main identity.

This has been my little mantra, anyways, that I like to tell myself.

But what to do when everyone else around seems to be 'fulfilled' by jobs or spouses or families??? PRAY, I say! It's all we can do!

My roommates and I have long joked that we need to get a statue of St. Joseph for our home to bring us husbands- since he is their patron! And today I just realized, on this my one year anniversary of my job, he is the patron saint of workers too. Laborers often pray to him for just wages and finding work.

I'm not one for statues myself (a weird phobia for a Catholic living in DC I know, but they FREAK me OUT) so I found a novena to St. Joseph that I think I'm going to start. What the heck. Can't hurt, right?

But as I found myself praying the prayer, a little tidbit that my spiritual director confided to me a month or so ago came to mind, 'don't pray for THINGS'. And I myself was hesitant to ask St. Joseph straight outright anyways for a husband...it just doesn't seem right. GIVE ME THIS. NOW. IN NINE DAYS. Probably not the best use of prayer time.

Into my head this thought pops- TOTALLY unsolicited or invited, mind you, such rude thoughts....

'pray for PATIENCE'

Now, we all know this is the LAST thing anyone should ever pray for because then your patience is TESTED, friends! So I battled it out with St. Joseph briefly.

Really? I should pray for 'patience' for a spouse or a fulfilling job? That's really what I need to be praying for? Haven't I been patient enough?? Humph. I know people always say things come when you aren't LOOKING for things. But how do I FIND them if I don't LOOK, huh? HUH?!

I realize my verbal foot stomping here makes me look like a three year old child in need of a little...well... patience. Fine. I will try this patience prayer novena thing. St. Joseph did not have it easy. He definitely got a bum deal in many ways- angels telling him stuff in dreams, getting the responsibility of a father kind of sprung on him without his invitation necessarily....I guess he could be a good patience patron for me. At least maybe he could help me be more understanding of it.

Well, I'll let you know how that goes...

St. Joseph, Foster Father and Patron of Husbands and Workers, pray for us!


Maria said...

Praying for peace and patience really is a great prayer... I once prayed a 54 day rosary novena for patience and guess what happened on that 54th day?

Thomas Joseph said...

GREAT post! Obviously I LOVE that you went to visit Cali. I know, it's hard to believe that I moved from there, right? God has a sense of humor with His plans sometimes.

Ugh. Tell me how the patience thing goes. I'm praying for you! Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. :)