Quality not Quantity

"For the vision still has its time,
presses on to fulfillment, and will not disappoint;
if it delays, wait for it,
it will surely come, it will not be late."- Habakkuk 2:3

Last weekend, my college friends and I celebrated our 10 year reunion. In some ways, it feels very much like 10 years and in other ways, I can't believe it. Many of my friends are married with growing children already. But I was also very ( and somewhat pleasantly :) surprised that many still- like myself-are not. Many are still finding their way and discovering things about themselves 10 years later. 

These were all taken pre- Facebook, so my friends were scanning pics and posting them all the week before the reunion...don't we look like babies??!

10 years later:

Still lookin' good, right?

So last weekend, I'm surrounded by all these special people in my life- I even had two of close friends stay with me in my new apt- so we hung out like old times all weekend and then...it was back reality. And the starkness of my current state in life- independent and single- sank in once again. I thought I would feel it more when I was with all my friends and their new respective friends and family, but I was actually pleasantly surprised, like I said, at how it felt like old times. I did have a conversation, though, with one of my old roommates who is now a mother of two and it went kind of along the lines of the following:

Me: "Wow! It doesn't feel like 10 years!"

My old roomie: "Oh, it does to me!"

Me: "Oh, I guess your life is pretty different with two kids, right?"

Her: "Yup."

Me: "Yeah.....my life isn't that different...."

In my mind, I felt bad that my life really wasn't much different than 10 years ago.  But she actually posted about this same conversation later on FB from a different perspective. She expressed concern that her life was SO different and that she felt different from many of us. (That is why, THIS: )

This current weekend, like I alluded to, hurt a little bit. I had made plans to hang out with a friend and then she got sick so I was left to fend for myself. Just like my conversation with my aforementioned roommate, our states in life can be a double edged sword. I LOVE my independence. But then there are weekends like this one where it gets kind of old. I'm sure she LOVES her children and husband but probably has weekends where it can seem like a lot to bear.

I tried to make the most of my unexpected free day doing things that I love- being outside, praying, going to a movie, etc. And it was a good day! But my prayer kind of looked like this:

"SERIOUSLY GOD!?!?! UGH! I'M SO DONE WITH MAKING THE SAME PRAYER FOR YEARS NOW"

I had recently prayed a novena and I got, what I felt, was a pretty significant sign. But then this week kind of made me question the answer I thought I got. So I prayed to God yesterday for ANOTHER sign. Ha. Who does that? I was totally up front with God:

 "LOOK, I know this is probably very wrong of me, but I'm gonna need ANOTHER sign, ok?"

 And I believe the readings for today were my answer.

The verse from Habakkuk that I began with was a pretty strong sign for me to continue to hope and wait for God's plan. As well as the fact that this prophet seems to just get me:

"How long, O Lord? I cry for help but you do not listen! I cry out to you...but you do not intervene!" - Habakkuk 1:2

I don't know much about the prophet Habakkuk, but I definitely can empathize with his form of prayer!

My guy Paul, too, gives hope (as always) in his second letter to Timothy:

"I remind you, to stir into flame
the gift of God that you have through the imposition of my hands. 
For God did not give us a spirit of cowardice
but rather of power and love and self-control. 
So do not be ashamed of your testimony to our Lord,
nor of me, a prisoner for his sake;
but bear your share of hardship for the gospel
with the strength that comes from God."

Paul always reminding me that it could be worse (imprisonment, for example...) and that God has not left us to fend for ourselves but empowers us with His strength in difficult moments. 

The Gospel was a little harder to unpack (Luke 17: 5-10), but began with the parable of the mustard seed, which the priest at Mass chose to focus on. Obviously, the moral of this parable is that if we have great faith we can do great things. But I guess I never bothered to think before about the quality versus quantity of it. 

I guess many would say I have great faith. I've given a lot of my life to the Church and I do turn to God alot. He's a pretty big part of my life. But is that quality of faith always there?? I mean, as I mentioned above, I had to ask for a SECOND sign, because I wasn't totally convinced. Moses got shunned from the Promised Land for that kind of talk...

The same can be said for friendships and relationships- it's not the being surrounded by people 24/7, but the quality of those friends and companions that you can count on. I was in pretty amazing company last weekend- so much so that their absence was striking this weekend. But I was reminded this weekend that God does have a plan, and it is the quality of relationship and trust that I must bring to the table.

I have A LOT of quality people in my life- even if I'm not around them most of the time. I am envious of those who get to have their BFF around them 24/7, but I trust in God's plan and His time for me. As the prophet Habakkuk says: "...the vision still has its time, presses on to fulfillment, and will not disappoint..." 

if we have but the faith to believe it.

Peace,
Julia

The Women in My Life

Those of you who know me know that I go down to Richmond a fair amount to see some of besties who live there (and get my hair did. My hair stylist, Missi, is the greatest. She is a 90s music connoisseur, has a great sense of humor, and has become one of my biffles or besties as well).

A couple of weekends ago when I was in Richmond, my girls and I were porching it (aka- hanging out on the front porch, taking in the Richmond scene, consuming a beverage or two, etc.) and discussing what makes one a feminist. Just your typical Friday night fodder. Actually, some of them keep a feminist blog and, well, we *are* all women, so the fact that we would be discussing such matters is hardly unheard of.

I have always considered myself somewhat of a feminist in that I believe in promoting women's strength and equality to men in a civil rights sense. I know that men and women are created differently (duh). But history has a track record of also treating us differently in an offensive, oppressive way, so I'm a feminist in that I want to ensure that that never happens again and stops happening in places that anti-feminism still exists. I believe women can do what men can do (again, in a civil sense) and ALL people should be given equal, basic human rights regardless of race or gender.

In the course of our conversation, we brought up a certain iconic female rap artist and debated whether she is a feminist or not. She is an artist that has proven her equality with men in that she can do what they do and rap about sex in a vulgar way. We wondered: is she asserting her equality with them? Or is she actually demeaning herself and women by rapping about her body and all of the things that she can/a man can do with/to it.

I chose to vote for the latter. And since then, I've thought about the music and artists I grew up and whether or not they promoted a positive, feminist model for me. I feel like I grew up in an age (the 80s or 90s) in which women were finding their way in a man's world and finally starting to assert themselves successfully in it- whether that be in the workplace, the art world, etc. Power suits became a thing, though, they were not pretty:

The ladies of Designing Women....God, I loved that show....

I actually debated with a student last year whether a power suit made you a feminist or not. She (and we certainly thought so in the 80s) seemed to think that wearing a suit made a woman equal to man. I happen to think you can still dress feminine and like a lady and be treated equally to a man. And if someone talks down to you because you are looking cute and professional and sophisticated in a super cute dress or skirt, well, then shame on them.

But here are some of the ladies I looked up to as a kid and an adolescent. I kind of wish girls and teens today had some of the same rolemodels:

Debbie Gibson
This was seriously the first woman I idolized. And I apparently still idolize her since I have the same bangs 20 some years later:

I think she was only in her late teens or early twenties at the time herself, and her pop songs may have not been all that prolific (see Electric Youth) but she wrote her OWN. SONGS. And she was always fully clothed. Can Rihanna say that? After a summer full of nannying I've learned that a young girl's first music tastes are not always refined, so please don't judge me. Though, I do find myself judging Deborah now herself when I follow her shameless self-promotion on Vine.

Janet Jackson
She was in "Control" and I loved her for it. I still want to realize my dream of creating a musical based on her work and using her original "Rhythm Nation" and "If" choreography. I would merely write and stage the musical as I could never, ever master the aforementioned choreography. Janet started her music career all covered up physically and eventually she started showing some skin. "Janet" was definitely one of the most scandalous albums I ever owned, but I think that says more about my music collection than it does about her.

Salt N Pepa
These ladies. Remember the female rapper I mentioned earlier? She needs to take a note from these ladies. Like Janet and the Designing Women before them, they started their careers mostly covered up and dressed even a little more masculine. No doubt to fit into the male dominated rap game they were a part of (I love that I just used the phrase "rap game" appropriately and non ironically). But like Janet, they eventually shed their skin, but I don't believe to fit into a more over-sexed, objectified female trend. They had already proven their chops. They were just doing them and their lyrics (unlike aforementioned female rapper) can back that up.

Kim Deal (of The Pixies and The Breeders)
Oh man did I ever want to be this lady from The Breeders- one of my favorite alternative bands of the 90s. I think I even had that same Phantom of the Opera oversized shirt. Not really, but it was also not unlikely. I don't think teenagers realize that we used to LIKE wearing our clothes baggy. That it was a THING. We would tie things around our waists ON PURPOSE not to hide a spot or stain on our pants. But Kim Deal was one of my alternative idols with her eccentric, musical style. Again, another woman doing her amid a largely male-dominated scene like the 90s grunge scene.

Shirley Manson
No, she is not related to Marilyn. That man scared the begeebus out of me. She, however, like Kim Deal was a rocking, alternative chick heading up a band of all dudes and doing it in a feminine way. See also:

Gwen Stefani- beautiful and feminine with amazing style but doing it her way, not they way any trend or man tells her to. She makes the trends. But I can't even talk about her abs.

So clearly I am a child of the 80s and 90s. But Julia, this is a THEOLOGY blog. So can we get some Scriptural models up in here? I'm so glad you asked.

For my Masters degree I wrote a research paper on three different female types in the Old Testament. The Old Testament so rarely even mentions women (sadly. Alas, a sign of the culture and times) that those that are mentioned you know have to be pretty solid. Here are the ones I chose to profile:

Sarah
(She's peeping outside of the door no doubt overhearing the angel speaking to Abraham and laughing at what the news was- she's going to have a BABY? At her age?? Bah! Ain't nobody got time for that).
I read Genesis and some critiques for my research and found Sarah to be the strong, but "stand by your man" type. She was obviously a strong woman but had to abide by cultural norms. She let her husband sleep with a concubine (not feminist in my mind) but God told her that that was not part of the plan and she and Abraham needed to get with the program. The fact that she is clued into this plan is HUGE, however, since usually it's just the dudes in the O.T. who are running the show (but everyone knows that behind agreat Jewish man is a great Jewish woman ;)

Deborah
Now we are talking. Girl was the only female judge of Israel and she just sat and hung out under a tree (HER palm tree, no less- see Judges 4) and let the people come to HER. She also commanded a military from that tree. WHAT.

Jael
Let's call her the strong but silent type. She is kind of the "Joan" (if I may use a Mad Men analogy:)

Oh, man, I love the female characters on Mad Men, too...that's another blog for another time...



 in which she uses her female sexuality to lure a man and then promptly tricks him and turns the tables... running a stake through his head. Dudes are so dumb sometimes...and Jael knew this.

These are just some of the women I have chosen in the past to focus on, think about, and let influence my life in some way. Who am I currently influenced by you might ask? Well, pop culturally, I'm obsessed with female comedians and writers like Mindy Kaling, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, and Kristen Wiig. I may never be a writer because those ladies have already said it for me. Also, say what you will about this lady and her husband, but there is no denying that she is a powerful woman and a great study for feminism:

And of course, I'm surrounded by so many "real" ladies- my teacher friends, my Richmond girls, my Jingers-

Susan and Steph may actually be my real life heroes. Sus just had a baby and is already pursuing her phD. She also kept her last name when she got married which I think is kind of rad. Steph is one of the most athletic women I know and can run and tackle and throw like one of the guys and she is fierce when it comes to Fantasy Football. And they are both still such ladies!

And the real ladies in my life will also always be these ladies (with one on the way! My sis is preggers with a girl! And my cousin just had a girl, too!)

My cousins, sister, mother, grandmother, and I

Girl Power! (and that leads us to the Spice Girls... Feminist or not? I will leave that one up to you.)

Peace,
Julia

Feasting on the Assumption

There are so many word plays I could make with this feast...but you probably already "assumed" that... Har har har...oh, how I hate puns!

As I've already mentioned, I have a mixed relationship with the Blessed Mother (see Sept 19, 2012...I would hyperlink the post, but I'm working on my iPad app today and I don't know how to do that...humph). But for some reason I was super pumped to celebrate today's feast. I even gave myself a reminder in my phone to go to the vigil last night 'cause I knew I was busy all day today (Last full day of nannying and seeing one of my favvvvv performing artists tonight!!). And I was really glad I went to the vigil because the readings were different than the Mass for today.

This morning's readings use the excerpt from Revelations depicting the woman "clothed in sun" which is a great image for this feast ( the Assumption is the day we honor Mary being taken body and soul into heaven. Why doesn't she just "die" like the rest of us, you ask? Her body housed the Son of God for one! It doesn't get to decompose. For two, she was conceived without Original Sin, and one of the effects of Original Sin is death. No Original Sin= No earthly death. Kinda makes sense, right?).

The first reading used for the Vigil Mass last night, however, was the account of David bringing the Ark of the Covenant into Jerusalem, making it the Holy City it is today. The Ark of the Covenant housed the most sacred thing for the Israelites at the time: The Ten Commandments (and some say a piece of Moses/Aaron's staff). David, flawed as he was, had a pure heart and wanted to honor God and make Jerusalem a sacred city. We call Mary the "Ark of the Covenant" because she housed the most sacred thing for us: our Lord. And both she and David carried their respective sacred items with great joy.

I love the story of David bringing the Ark into Jerusalem because of his unbridled, unabashed simple joy for God. I can relate more to David, I believe, than I can Mary because he was flawed and she was/is perfect. However, while I identify more with David, I aspire to be more like Mary in her simplicity and obedience.

Here's a pic of my man David leading the way for the Ark with great fanfare:

Anyways, so the readings last night made me even more stoked for this feast today. Oh, and the Gospel from last night? ONLY ONE VERSE. And it was a good one! Luke 11: 27-28 (ok, so *two* verses):

"While Jesus was speaking, a woman from the crowd called out and said to Him: 'Blessed the womb that carried you....' He replied, ' Rather, blessed are those who hear the word of God and observe it.'"

Jesus, once again- the great deflector- putting the attention on other people rather than on Himself. I wonder if there are even shorter Gospel verses or readings ever read at Mass. I'm sure an even bigger Theology/Liturgy nerd than myself can answer that :)

And because I'm such a 90s nerd in addition to theological nerdiness, I always use Lauryn Hill's "To Zion" when talking about this story of David in my Scripture class. I believe she captures the joy of David bringing the ark to Zion (a mount in Jerusalem)  as well as Mary's joy of caring God's Son. Lauryn Hill for the win (always). I mean...Sister Act 2:

http://youtu.be/1sQjh261rU8

Enjoy this feast!

Peace,

Julia

Vanity and Vulnerability

Summer is winding down and any time something comes to end we pause to reflect: "was it well done? did we make the most of our time? What did we even do, really?!"

Summer has definitely gone way too fast- possibly the most overused, understated phrase ever- but it's true! 2 more weeks of nannying and then I'm back at school for teacher meetings and training already. I definitely think it was a summer well spent, though. No one can say I wasted any time! I put many hours in, did a lot of stuff around DC, made trips to Ohio and Florida, and if my goal was not to sit on my couch all summer, well then, mission accomplished.

I also feel pretty good about my summer goal of maintaining somewhat of a prayer routine. I've continued to take time before going to "work" as a nanny, read the Scripture readings of the day, read a little bit from Pope Francis, and examine and reflect a little each day.

So you are probably saying, GOOD FOR YOU, JULIA. If you are one of my kinder friends, you mean that sincerely. If you are one of my more snarky friends, you mean that sarcastically (and I love you for it). And to each of you I say THANKS. I'm pretty proud of myself. But before we get into vanity, I want to address the latter subject of this post.

This past week I went to Florida and got to spend time with some of my besties. I was reflecting today that these people each love me and accept me for who I am, know me well, but still call me and challenge me to be even more vulnerable which is often difficult for me. In other words, these friendships don't stop at surface level. They easily could. We could just talk about what we have in common, gossip, or shop (almost all of my best friends do this last thing well ;), but we don't. We call each other out while still being loving. I have been blessed with many of these types of relationships throughout my life, with different people at different times, all calling me to something greater by simultaneously loving me but calling me outside of my comfort zone.

Today's first reading kind of addresses this need to go beyond the surface and artificial because it is all vanity:

" Vanity of vanities, says Qoheleth, [ the author of Ecclesiastes, often attributed to Solomon]
vanity of vanities! All things are vanity!

Here is one who has labored with wisdom and knowledge and skill,
and yet to another who has not labored over it,
he must leave property. 
This also is vanity and a great misfortune. 
For what profit comes to man from all the toil and anxiety of heart
with which he has labored under the sun? 
All his days sorrow and grief are his occupation;
even at night his mind is not at rest. 
This also is vanity. " - Ecclesiastes 1:2, 2: 21-23

Now as a writer, I hate the standard, contrived intro to an idea of: "vanity is defined as... blah, blah, blah." But as a writer, I also always want to know the origins of and research words! So for the purposes of this post:  Vanity can be defined as: "the excessive belief in one's own abilities or attractiveness to others." (Stephen LaMarche a la wikipedia...I never said my sources had to be legit for my posting purposes ;)

This definition kind of cuts me to the heart. This is something I think we all struggle with- pride/vanity defined as above. I know I can get really trapped in my own mind and selfish thoughts if not for the aforementioned friendships and, of course, faith. We can get caught up in our own abilities and become consumed by how attractive we appear, if not for our true friends and True God to rely on and love us no matter what.

I have mentioned several times on this blog the retreats that I have been a part of with the school, particularly the Kairos retreat which we've recently implemented. Tonight, the original leaders of our 1st Kairos are getting together and I'm excited to catch up with the kids. After hearing the readings at Mass this morning and thinking about this week and weekend's events, I was meditating on what makes the Kairos retreats so special. It has to do with the same I idea that I mentioned about my close friends- on Kairos, the kids make themselves vulnerable and truly open themselves up to God and each other in a way that they haven't prior. It gives them a chance to move past the vanity of the world and be vulnerable in a healthy way that allows them to grow personally and spiritually. I need to be constantly reminded of this healthy openness and vulnerability, so I'm grateful for the reminder today.

I'm just grateful for the friends, Mass readings, and prayer time that I've gotten to enjoy this summer. If it could stay summer for a few MORE weeks I'd be even more grateful, but as is also said later in the book of Ecclesiastes: "to every thing a season."

Enjoy the rest of your summer! And here are some Florida beach pics for you to enjoy:

 Palm trees just instantly give me peace!

Ah, the ocean waves!

God gave us a rainbow on the first day on the beach! Always a reminder of His Promise and love.

Peace,
Julia

"The Laborer Deserves His Keep"

I started to write this blog post yesterday, but then the children (remember, I'm a nanny now...how can you forget if you follow me on Twitter ;) came running in to ask me something and all was lost. Sigh. I'm beginning to have great empathy particularly for my single mother friends. I don't know how you do it and juggle everything else.  I've always wondered this, which is why I have, perhaps, never felt called to motherhood. Juggling stresses me out!  I can do it (figuratively speaking) and I'm even kind of good at it, but I don't choose it. And i also prefer to juggle solo ;)  I have been told I have great maternal instinct, but I choose to use that instinct towards my students or for other people's kids who I can hand back after a couple of hours.

This is why many were shocked when I announced I was going to nanny this summer. I had made my distaste for spending my free time with children rather known (teaching teenagers is a different story. You can talk more with teenagers as opposed to having to come up with new games every day and managing your own classroom is way different than having to fend for yourself in an adventure in babysitting) so people wanted to know WHY. Why take a summer job? Why take THIS summer job?

As I said in my last blog post, I did feel somewhat called to it. Maybe to feel empathy for my friends with kids who are growing by the numbers. I also had met the kids and they seemed really cool and chill and that it would be fun to get to know them (which it is). But mostly, I wanted to DO something. I know summer is for sitting and relaxing, but I have never been able to do that for long! I don't know about you, but I always have to be doing something, accomplishing some kind of goal, and making good use of my time...damn my strong work ethic!

It is interesting that, in this time of relaxing and summer, we have had at Mass this week readings about labor. This past Sunday at Mass we heard that "the harvest is abundant but the laborers are few" and in today's Gospel Jesus tells his apostles to do all these tasks that seem impossible: "Cure the sick! Raise the dead! But take nothing with you! The laborer deserves his keep." (Matt. 10: 7-15)

My thoughts on these Gospels have been: "Send more laborers into your harvest already! I'm starting to get a little frustrated and tired, here. Why can't I just lay around and get lost in video games and the traps of the culture like everyone else? Humph. And what does it mean, Jesus, that the 'laborer deserves his keep?' you just told us to keep nothing! I'm onto you!" I mean, I know I said that I like to keep busy and work, but WHY me? 

So these are the questions I have found myself asking this summer: Why labor? Why take the job in the summer? Why try to stay busy and persevere? Why labor in the Church when many make it seem like a lost cause?

I clearly have to meditate more on these things, but God does provide some answers in this week's readings. The Old Testament readings have been the story of Jacob and his sons. I love teaching this particular chapter to my students because they always freak out when they realize what a playa Jacob was: 12 sons (and probs even more kids counting his daughters) by at least four women. AND Jacob got to be blessed by God and given the name Israel even though he tricked his father Isaac into giving him the inheritance and birthright in the first place. These stories never make much sense to us because it doesn't seem fair. It's not fair that Jacob is one of the founding patriarchs of our faith when he lied and became a polygamist. Just like it might not seem fair that we have to work so hard. But I have come to see these stories as stories of hope. If they can do all that crazy and still be blessed and forgiven, certainly God will keep his covenant with me!

And so we see in the readings that it's not always fair they way things work out, but God is faithful. That is what the Old Testament readings are meant to show us: that God has kept and fulfilled His promises. It is hard to remember in the midst of our labor, but it is what does and should keep me going and why I do what I do. I just have to have these reminders from time to time and God knows that. 

The last bit of Scripture I will leave with today: "Without cost you have received, without cost you are to give." This line is also from today's Gospel and I believe sums up what I've been trying to say. It may not seem (at least it doesn't for me!) that I was given something without cost. I feel like I have earned what God has given me and worked hard for it, but the reality is, we don't have to do anything. God's grace is a free gift and we don't earn it. This a hard concept for us to understand, and sometimes we want to show off our labor like a badge of honor, but it is not ours to tote around and flaunt. This is why we labor: to share the gift that is worthy to be given freely. Not just to keep us busy, but because we have been given a gift that we are called to share. And I guess since it's not really us doing all the work in the first place, that's why we don't really deserve our "keep." But he gives us the reward of His promises any way. 

Peace,

Julia

Some evidence of my "labor" this summer:

I've become quite the baker thanks to my new little helper...

We also have Fashion Shows...

I join the moms in the waiting area at gymanstics class....

And I rejoice when I get a moment to read when they are playing with friends :) I'm like a pseudo-mom!

A Solid Start to Summer

Today is officially the beginning of summer, though I have actually been honing my pool/couch lounging skills for about 10 days now!

I decided to take my annual Ohio summer trip early on in the season since I will be working as a nanny for the next 8 weeks or so. Gah! Working with kids when I don't have to? What was I thinking?! I guess I was thinking it was God's will or something. (Also, that it is good money and a new experience that will hopefully keep me moving and active instead of permanently fixated on my new couch. Though, I'm still not entirely sure why I told myself that wasn't an option.)

My trip home was a good one- relaxing and filled with family as per usual. I got to be home for Father's Day which was really nice. I usually just send cards for the Hallmark holidays, but there I was! In the flesh! Reciting my greeting much less poetically, but still sentimentally nonetheless. We spent the day (my parents and I) by going to Mass, watching baseball and golf on tv, and later hosting my Babci, sister, nephew, brother-in-law, and our neighbor at our house.

No one is surprised that I was particularly struck by the Mass on Sunday, though, I was also quite taken aback by my new-found interest in GOLF. I've never been able to sit through broadcastings of the sport for more than 10 minutes previously at best. Perhaps with each decade comes a higher tolerance for watching men in funny pants walk across green fields and swing clubs in silence? I may never know.

The readings for this past Sunday were all about forgiveness, as the priest who was presiding at my parent's parish pointed out (cue the Don Henley which was running on repeat in my head each time the priest said the above noted *f* word. Heh.)

The first was about David and God forgiving him for, oh you know, taking another man's wife for himself and then sending said other man to the frontlines to be killed. Just your typical biblical patriarch. KIDDING. But that really happened.

The second reading is from my beloved St. Paul and his letter to the Galatians in which Paul says it is no longer he that lives, but Christ that lives in him. The priest at Mass called that line to our attention as well as how dramatic Paul's conversion was. He reminded us that Paul was killing and persecuting early Christians but then completely renounced himself and his old ways because Christ called him. Again- Christ not only forgives but then uses someone who was once doing something evil to carry out his mission.

Lastly, the Gospel is the beautiful encounter in Luke with the woman who anoints Christ's feet with oil. Some say this woman is Mary Magdalene, and she is mentioned later in the passage as following Christ when he journeys from one town to another. But the part that I was struck by was Christ explaining the action to Simon with this story:

Simon, I have something to say to you.”
“Tell me, teacher, ” he said.
“Two people were in debt to a certain creditor;
one owed five hundred day’s wages and the other owed fifty.
Since they were unable to repay the debt, he forgave it for both.
Which of them will love him more?”
Simon said in reply,
“The one, I suppose, whose larger debt was forgiven.”
He said to him, “You have judged rightly.”

We like to keep a tally of people's debts and weigh them against our own. We want people to suffer for their error or feel shame. We quickly forget that being Christian is about forgiveness and that we should want everyone to experience the true love and forgiveness of Christ. And those with the bigger debts often are the ones who God uses significantly- like David, Paul, and this woman in the Gospel- and teach us about His truth and love.

One last bit of church-y nerdiness: I noticed while at my parent's parish something that I already knew- how much a difference good liturgy really makes. At my parent's parish people were singing. The music was modern (which I know is not how all like to worship. I myself do have a place in my heart for the traditional, but I like to switch it up a little here and there), there were drums and multiple instruments, the preaching was good and involved the congregation, and the Eucharist and Scripture were still the main focus for the community and the priest. I was excited to see these books being used which made me think of my Workcamp friends (who are working hard this week in the diocese!) and my friends at Spirit and Song:

This week in Ohio went really quickly! Here are some pics of other things that happened:

Hanging out at a marina on Lake Erie with a friend...

I love dive bars and they abound in CLE.  I also can't resist a Polish dive bar... see below:

I also got to start each morning with the sun, a book, and my mom's garden :)

And I didn't realize it until I was sitting back in my apt in VA and reading my aunt's post on Facebook that today is the second anniversary of my Grandma Mary's death. In some ways, two years seems to have come and gone quickly. But I think about and pray to my Grandma often. She was such a selfless and classy lady:

I wish I had a better pic of the two of us, but here is Grandma and I in 2007 at my "going away" party before I entered the convent:

Forgiveness, Family, and summer Fun are my words for the week! A solid start to summer indeed.

Peace,
Julia

"Ordinary" Time

So much has gone on since I last wrote! I graduated! Pentecost happened! My students have graduated! And summer is finally HERE! One more day of giving exams and it is time to grade, pack up the classroom, and be FREE!

Here are some snapshots from the past month or so:

 My mom, my grandmother and I at my MA graduation in May

 Getting that diploma!

After graduation with some of my fav student graduates 

I recognize now what I somewhat surmised before- that my some of my students have taken to reading this blog. So HELLO student stalkers! Are you surprised to see that this blog is pretty much exactly what I talk about in the classroom? That is- nerdy liturgy speak?? Well....WELCOME. You don't get extra credit for this.

My reflections have really started to center around the liturgical seasons, it seems. And with the Easter season now over and Pentecost come and gone, we are left to be sent out into summer and, well, ordinary time.

There are still plenty of feasts hidden within Ordinary Time, however, and I enjoy finding them as I go to daily Mass...which, I really need to get back into the habit of going to daily Mass. But that's what summer is for, right?

I've struggled to get into a routine with this new-found freedom of living in my own place and having all of the free time! But I'm making it a goal this summer to get back into a routine of prayer and daily Mass. It seems that I was able to do this much in the summer of 2011- my first summer after teaching. Last summer was a whirlwind of travel! Which has left everyone (myself included) what does this summer have in store?

An opportunity presented itself for me to nanny for two children ages 12 and 10. I met the family, and said yes. I didn't have any plans for this summer and although working with children in my time away from children wasn't in my plans, I also didn't want to be bored all summer. I wanted a plan, a routine. I think this opportunity will be a good experience for me and a good outlet this summer. I do feel like it's part of God's plan for whatever reason.

And even though I haven't been in much of a prayer routine of late, I do continue to see God's hand in my life all over the place. I know He is at work through His Spirit especially in this time post Pentecost. I really loved this line from today's reading from St. Paul (me? enjoying something from St. Paul? I know you are shocked):

I want you to know, brothers and sisters,
that the gospel preached by me is not of human origin.
For I did not receive it from a human being, nor was I taught it,
but it came through a revelation of Jesus Christ. - Galatians 1:11

I've been getting very wrapped up in the human aspects of our faith recently for whatever reason. And I've forgotten that religion and faith is about REVELATION and a personal revelation from Christ.

Hopefully, that is what our faith is for you all, too. Not solely the human infrastructure that can be broken and fallible at times. But the infallible movements of the Spirit of God in our Church and in our lives.

The last time I met for spiritual direction, Father suggested that I re-visit the writings of St. Teresa of Avila's Interior Castle. I had tried reading it once before, but I found I couldn't get into it once again. I was praying, though, and realized that I really get inspiration from the documents of the Church and Vatican documents. (Once a Theology student, always a Theology student, apparently!). We have a new pope, so I thought I'd check out some of his new writings. Then I saw a former teen that I had worked with in my youth ministry days posted about this book:

and I was sold. I've only read the first few chapters but I am inspired by what our current Holy Father and this holy rabbi he is writing with have to say about dialogue between faiths and with non-believers. They don't speak about dialogue with non-believers in a "we must convert them way" but in a "we need to listen and meet them where they are at because they have value" kind of way. Love it! I believe the Holy Spirit is truly moving in our Church still!

I'm also excited because a friend of mine who I got to see ordained three years ago will be joining my colleagues and I as the chaplain at our school this fall!

Summer weather and some time off certainly help to put me in a good mood, but I also just love this "ordinary" time post- Pentecost to get back in a routine of my own with God and enjoy the fruits of His Spirit. 

Happy Summer, everyone!

Peace,

Julia