A week or so ago, I was gchatting with a friend about my woes (spoiler: same things I've been bemoaning for the past two years or so- why isn't God moving me to a new place, new job, new vocation, blah, blah, blah ;) and I was telling her about the novena I am doing to the Holy Spirit (which is now complete! Come Holy Spirit on this eve of Pentecost!)
She reminded me that Pentecost is technically the Birthday of the Church. I'm sure I've thought of this once before, but she says she's made it a point to celebrate each year in this light. Well, that sounded right up my alley, because I love a good party!
I know I'm whining and moaning about change and how I'm hoping for new and big things. And I'm constantly struggling to accept the ordinary. Truth is, this Pentecost- though it is the anniversary of a couple things for me and Jesus (leaving the convent, celebrating time in Guatemala, end of this novena, etc)- may not present anything big or new. I am praying that it does, but as many friends and I have discussed these past years- what if it doesn't? Are we going to be okay? How are we going to still use the gifts the Holy Spirit does bring ('cause He will bring them) even if they are not what we want?
Last night, I helped a friend sing for a young adult event. There was praise and worship Adoration and I was really looking forward to it. Praise and Worship Adoration was something that drew me close to the Eucharist in college, but I think because it often is a 'go-to' way to worship in youth ministry, I started to take it for granted. It became a standard way to worship, and sadly, wasn't new and conducive to prayer for me as it had once been.
After Adoration, there was the (often dreaded) 'young adult event' ;) Usually this consists of awkward mingling by young people (and those perhaps not exactly young as opposed to just single).
This event already proved to be a little different from my other experiences because it was $10 ALL YOU CAN DRINK beer, wine, and rail drinks! Why do not more young adult events do this! It makes them so much less painful :)
But it was also different because, though there was the typical mingling and live music (which my friend and I provided) there was also a talk that I was really impressed with about what young adult ministry should be as opposed to the stereotypes it often falls into (singles group)
The speaker-who was a youth minister in the Archdiocese of Baltimore and also an engaged man- identified that is no longer common for young people to get married in their early 20's right out of college. Many wait 'til their late 20s, early-mid thirties, even forties. For some of us, this may be a choice, some of this may be a call. And not everyone is called to marriage! By identifying young adults and young adult groups as simply people looking to meet a spouse, this isolates so many other people with different vocations and calls.
I think this is something good for my friends and I to reflect on as we celebrate the birthday of the Church. The Church is some 2000 years old! But Her identity is changing, as it always has. WE are the Church- young, old, married, unmarried, consecrated, confused-how are we going to be Church now? What is God calling us to be?
And if we don't know yet, how are we going to continue to serve the Church in the capacities we do have and know without getting discouraged?
I like to think I have my dreams and goals, but if those don't become realized, I am willing to go with God's alternative routes. I definitely get discouraged, but I have the hope that God knows me better and knows what will shape me. I can only hope that I am docile and open to the ways He wants to show me.
So I continue to pray this Pentecost for docility to the Spirit. I hope for change, but I mostly hope to see how I may serve the Church now and celebrate Her past and future on this anniversary/birthday.
Happy Pentecost! Come Holy Spirit!!!
Peace,
Julia
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