So perhaps here is the blogpost I should've written yesterday that may be more applicable to all ;) A little more 'user-friendly', perhaps. You all are all too kind to indulge me.
okay, so today is the first day after, oh, probably a good two-three weeks that I am back in a routine. Daily Mass, a little prayer time, 9-5 in the office, and then my weekly evening commitments. I know most of us have a love/hate relationship with routines. They are such Catch-22s. We need them to keep us sane, but then they can also dangerously drive us into ruts if we aren't careful. And thereby, then, slowly make us INsane. Truth?
I know when I returned from the convent, I really missed my routine that I had developed there. But while I was there, I was also going crazy because of the lack of spontaneity in my life. It's all about balance people.
So I had finally set into a good prayer routine here (after about a year or so...better late than never?? ;) and then in one full swoop, the snow took it away. But it ended up being a good way to shake us up, reflect, and perhaps add a new spin or perspective to the routine.
Retreat always does this too. We go away so we can come back refreshed and with new perspective on our everyday. Done and done. ;)
So I definitely felt renewed with my routine and (silent!) drive to work today. I was meditating on the OTHER part of the retreat that struck me. Along with our authentic self and our realization of our (figurative ;) nakedness, Feduccia brought a little Thomas Merton (backslash Teresa of Avila, backslash St. Paul!) to the table with the message: "God Alone Suffices".
Thinking about our spiritual routines, it usually takes a stirring before we get settled into one. Like, the beginning of Lent or Ash Wednesday can knock us into a routine, but also maybe a cute boy at daily Mass or a priest whose homilies we really like (just saying, it happens ;) these things may draw us into a routine...
...but what keeps us there?
It HAS to be God alone.
Tying this into the thoughts about our authentic selves and the fear of what God might be calling us to DO- even without those outer layers of self, what we do for a living, our vocation in life- God alone is what has to keep us centered and grounded.
Today is the Feast of the Chair of Peter. The Gospel when celebrating Peter is usually the "Who do You Say that I am" passage because it is here that Jesus instates Peter as the Rock of the Church. However, today, thinking about call and our need for confidence in God I noticed: Peter first proclaims Jesus as the Son of God before he gets his 'call'.
Peter had to acknowledge his ultimate faith and belief in God before God told him what to do next (and even after Jesus tells him what to do, he doesn't really leave much guideline! Pretty sure Peter was shooting blanks there for a while..."er, how does this papacy thing work??" Right. ;)
All the spiritual guides or saints that I have been drawn to in the past years- Therese of Lisiuex, Mother Teresa, John of the Cross, St. Paul- they had this confidence in God first and foremost. Regardless of what the Lord was calling them to do. If He was calling them to do something great- they moved. But even if not (and more often not!) they were happy and satisfied with just confidence in knowing His Love for them alone.
I think I've pretty much said these things in one way or another all year- it has to be God alone. We have to live in the present. We can't take a step without being rooted in Him, and He has to be what always draws us back, regardless of circumstance.
Thanks for reading and indulging me again ;) Happy Lent!
Peace,
Julia
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